![]() ![]() Your first few tries using a strap-on aren’t going to be the time to get super wild when it comes to sex positions. “A strap can be less easy for the top to control than a flesh cock, so if something isn’t working, don’t be afraid use your hands to adjust the toy so it’s hitting properly,” Lisa Finn, a sex educator and brand manager for Babeland, tells SELF. ![]() Sure, one draw of using a strap-on can be that it allows for intimate, hands-free activity, but that doesn’t mean the toy will always do what you want it to. Which is why amateur porn is the way to go-real sexual partners are far more likely to have actionable takeaways than professional performers who may have techniques that look good but aren’t actually enjoyable. You might pick up on little techniques, see ways people get creative, and generally demystify the whole ordeal. If you’ve never used a strap-on before (or even if you have), it’s incredibly useful to see them in action. “Especially amateur videos,” Maggie L., 31, suggests to SELF. The more comfortable you are with it on your own, the easier it will be to use it with a partner.” 3. “Wear your harness around the house as you do non-sexual activities, such as washing dishes or watching TV. “It’s going to feel weird at first,” Ashley Cobb, founder and host of Sex With Ashley and sex toy reviewer, tells SELF. You should give yourself time to get familiar with what it’s like to wear a harness. ![]() It really helps if the first time you wear your strap-on isn’t during sex. Wear the strap-on around before using it. Beyond that, there are a few important things to know about safety and partner communication before using a strap-on together, and you can find those pre-sex tips here. And no matter how you plan to use your strap-on, lube is always a good idea (just make sure it’s compatible with your dildo of choice-silicone lube degrades silicone toys, and oil-based lube can damage latex condoms, so water-based lube is likely a safe bet). This guide outlines some of the things to look for when buying a strap-on and includes product recommendations.Īlso, if you’re using a strap-on to experiment with anal play for the first time, there are ways you should prepare, which you can read about here. Which strap-on you use can make or break your experience, both from a comfort standpoint and from how easy it is to use. First things first, you want to make sure you have the right equipment. There are a few boxes you want to check before you dive into strap-on sex. Here are a few to keep in mind when you don your harness: 1. To help you feel more confident trying strap-on sex and upping your strap game, I asked sex toy experts and strap-on enthusiasts alike how to use a strap-on. With practice, communication, and the right equipment, you can soon be thrusting and grinding like a pro. Luckily, a learning curve is completely normal when it comes to using a strap-on. The first time I used a strap-on with a partner, I was so self-conscious about my awkward technique that I didn’t try again for like a year. Having sex with toys often isn’t as intuitive as using your own body, and a free-flying appendage where you’re not used to having one can feel especially unwieldy. If you’re curious about strap-on sex, you might be nervous too-not because you think it’d be bad, but because you don’t know how to use a strap-on. ![]()
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